Every man reading this has at least one skeleton in his liquor cabinet. That bottle you bought because it was on sale, or your brother-in-law swore it was “just as good,” or you were in a hurry and grabbed the wrong label. Mine was a plastic-handle Old Crow I picked up the week before Christmas last year. Got it home, poured a healthy three fingers neat, took one sip and actually said out loud, “Well that’s going straight to the cooking shelf.” Tasted like iodine and lawnmower gas.
I was already unscrewing the cap over the sink when I remembered something Chris Blatner said in an interview. Chris is the real deal – Executive Bourbon Steward, founder of Urban Bourbonist, runs Bourbon Charity – the kind of guy who can blind-taste ten pours and tell you the county they were distilled in. His advice for fixing cheap bourbon was so simple I thought he was messing with people:
Just blend a little good bourbon into the bad one.
Not equal parts, not some fancy 3-2-1 ratio. Just a splash. Think of it like putting A.1. on a cheap steak – a little bit of the good stuff covers a whole lot of sins.
I walked back to the bar, poured two ounces of that god-awful Old Crow, added half an ounce of Wild Turkey 101, swirled it once… and damn near dropped the glass. The burn was gone. Actual vanilla and caramel showed up like they’d been hiding the whole time. I sat there on the couch grinning like an idiot because I’d just turned a $19 mistake into something I’d gladly drink every night.
That bottle lasted me until March.
Here’s the dead-nuts simple method I’ve been using ever since:
- Pour your normal amount of the cheap bourbon in the glass first – two or three ounces, whatever you usually makes you happy.
- Add a small splash of the good stuff. Start with ¼ ounce. That’s literally a quick glug.
- Swirl, nose it, sip. Still got that nail-polish bite? Add another small splash. Keep going until it tastes right. I’ve gone as high as 50/50 on really rough bottles (looking at you, Ten High), but usually 3:1 or 4:1 does the trick.
- Add one big rock or a couple cubes if that’s your thing. Walk away proud.
I’ve rescued Evan Williams Black with Knob Creek, Very Old Barton with Buffalo Trace, Old Grand-Dad 114 with Elijah Craig Small Batch, even that nasty Georgia Moon corn whiskey with a heavy pour of Four Roses Single Barrel. Every single time it works. It’s the cheapest upgrade you’ll ever buy.
Best “Hero” Bottles That Punch Way Above Their Price
You don’t need Pappy to make this trick work. These are everyday bottles you can find anywhere for $25–$45 and they fix almost anything:
- Wild Turkey 101 – the king of fixers. Spicy, bold, high proof, covers flaws like a tarp.
- Buffalo Trace – smooth, sweet, cheap as chips in most states.
- Elijah Craig Small Batch – rich, oaky, turns water into wine.
- Knob Creek 9-year – big vanilla bomb, stupidly good for the money.
- Old Grand-Dad Bonded – if you want to stay under $30 for both bottles, this is your huckleberry.
- Larceny or Old Forester 100 – wheated ones if you like things softer.
Keep one of these on the shelf and you’re bulletproof.
The Bottom Line
You don’t have to drink like a millionaire to drink better than average. A $20 bottle plus a $35 bottle and five seconds of swirling beats a $60 bottle you’re afraid to open. I’ve got friends who still think I’ve “gotten better taste” over the last year. Little do they know I’m just a cheap bastard with one good trick.
So quit suffering through bad bourbon and quit pouring money down the drain. Grab a decent mid-shelf bottle next time you’re at the store, keep it in the front row, and treat it like the world’s best seasoning.
Your cabinet, your liver, and your bank account will all thank you.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got half a handle of Very Old Barton that’s begging for a shot of Elijah Craig.
Cheers, fellas. Drink better, spend smarter.
